What’s the easiest writing tip ever? Don’t start with “we” or “I.”
This makes me crazy in copywriting, because any time a marketing piece–be it an email, a web page, a print piece–starts with “we” or “I,” we’ve turned off the potential customer.
Why? Because people only care about themselves, and that includes you and me, so I’m not dissin’ on anyone here. We are all only human.
But, here’s the deal: This is also a turnoff in business communication and writing at work.
So write like a copywriter and start your message with a “you” or a “your.” It will be more likely to be read, and even more likely to be acted upon.
And what if the words “we” and “I” keeping showing up on your screen because that’s how you write? That is fine, dear one. That is HOW we write, but that is also WHY we edit.
So write about you first, then change it to be about the other first.
Here’s What I Mean…
Here’s an example from a marketing piece that showed up in my mailbox. It started “We work with many of your neighbors…”
Boring! I don’t care. Better to start with something like, “Would you like your trees to look as healthy as your neighbor’s?”
And this is how it shows up in workplace writing: “I’m writing about the meeting next week…” Ugh. Better to start with something like, “Are you available to talk about next week’s meeting?”
You can start with “we” or “I,” but edit it out for better writing at work.
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Sharon Ernst
Sharon Ernst is a freelance editor and writer at www.weknowwords.com, a teacher and coach at www.betterfasterwriter.com. And a farmer and planet saver at www.literalroadfarm.com.